Journal Entry #1

The last year at Xavier University has been an interesting one. I got hired on as a Graduate Assistant in the Office of Multicultural Affairs, met the director and co-director. I have to say I was really impressed by their passion for students and there commitment to the success of the office.
I was excited to work under not one but TWO African Americans in Higher Education. Paul and Tekeia were a joy to watch. Honestly I was hesitant to work under Paul. My past experience with black men in places of power had been negative. Black men in power that I had worked for had tended to be arrogant, distant and NOT a team player. Paul's relationship with Tekeia in the end gave a good example of what teamwork is and what it means to be a black man in leadership. His integrity and commitment to the process keeps me here today.

Shortly after my arrival to OMA, The office changed with the going of Paul, the welcome of Leslie and the storm of programs. From March - June we (the staff) were at the mercy of schedules, commitments and trying to be consistent while not selling out to "Paul James ain't here, you are going to fail" mentalities Tekeia took all the blows with grace. I was amazed. I would have thrown in the towel the first week. She stayed strong, challenged me to be myself, curb my anger and not take work home with me.

Over the Summer, I rested. I had a lot of time to think on the meaning of work and life. I have to say I found no answers. I realized that I really want to do something in the professional world that will have meaning to the rest of the world. I am blessed be in jobs that meet this need, but the joy that I had right out of college for college students, higher education and social justice is no where to be found. I want passion.. how do I get it back? I think it has been the combination of so much transition in every job I have had and the last 4 years of doing "grunt work" to prove myself has brought me to this point. I am a passionate person but can find no drive other than the end product to motivate me. As a result, I come into the Office of Multicultural Affairs a little hesitant to get excited about anything.

I am currently been assigned the task of putting Smooth Transitions Mentoring Program into motion for the year. I was mildly excited because I had experience in the arena of mentoring and was looking forward to testing some new ideas and connecting with students. I rolled out a plan to Robert, got little feedback and started contacting people. When reviewing my progress with Robert and Tekeia, I was presented with a new plan, got an email today, and am called to execute it.

Smooth Transitions is know grunt work... period. When does grunt work end and career begin?
As I wrap my first journal entry up, I want to leave the reader with a list of things that motivate me, hopefully I will find it this year.

1. Students that want to learn as well as teach (me) through relationship.
2. Projects that bring about life change.
3. Small Projects.
4. Research
5. Learning, reading conferences and time to apply new ideas.
6. Independent projects that are absent of micro management.